Well, the re-launch of Peter Parker’s story has started off strong, but can it keep its momentum? Find out in my review of The Amazing Spider-Man #2!
The comic begins with a young woman in a closed room watching videos of old spider-man fights to study his moves. Since she’s capable of using natural webbing like Ultimate Jessica Drew, it’s safe to assume she’s Silk. She even knows his secret identity, which doesn’t make sense if she was affected by the same spell that put up a psychic blind-spot, but maybe after he broke the spell she recalled someone else being bitten and put two and two together again.
Then we go back to where it left off last issue, with Anna asking why Peter didn’t tell her he was Spider-Man. In what must be the smartest thing that I’ve seen when it comes to secret identities, he comes clean about the situation with Doc Ock. She… takes it better than I expected, mainly by closing up her emotions and diving into cooking to think about everything logically. Peter wonders just how far Otto has screwed up his life once more as he gets a call from the Avengers stating they need to talk.
With Electro, he goes to lay low with a woman who seems infatuated with him. He explains that since he accidentally destroyed the prison while trying to spring the other bad guys none of them want to help him out and that his powers were screwed up. She likes the danger, so she’s probably one of those monster fan-girls you hear about.
At the Avengers Tower Peter explains once more that he was possessed by Otto, who changed his web formula so he has to wear pants out since his webbing underwear still won’t come off and he has to pee. And he brought cookies, which are the best thing they’ve apparently tasted. The medical scan comes clean and things seem to look up until Captain America reveals he knew Flash had Venom, which Peter was offended at finding out last since Flash is someone close to him and Venom is like a jilted ex-girlfriend with yandere tendencies.
As much as I like Captain America getting knocked around he does state that Flash had a secret identity like him and fair is fair. He also states he understands what it’s like to wake up and find the world’s changed so much and he’s trusting Peter to watch over the place while they go deal with the prison break and to get rid of those baggy pants. When he goes back to his lab to do that he finds that their rollout project’s glitch has gotten worse and since he’s not an expert in cybernetics like Otto was he begs for help inside his head.
Cue Anna coming in and making me realize why I like her so much.
She gets some privacy with Peter by lying about being pregnant, at least I’m hoping she was lying, and explains that she understands the cybernetics since Otto explained it to her so many times and can teach him since that was her last job as a T.A. before she left it to work with them. Then, after Electro accidentally kills the girl when she kisses him despite his warnings, she tells him where the dissolvent for the web fluid is and she’d cover for him, as well as getting to be his roommate until she can find a place of her own.
She earned that raise alright. Best character to come out of Superior Spider-Man barring Otto himself.
Peter goes out to confront Electro and learn once more that Otto has screwed him over by experimenting with Electro’s powers. He’s not the only one who’s been screwed over as we learn that the Human Torch is depowered at the moment in the audience and Black Cat is next to him and used her luck powers to stop Electro from being shorted out as repayment for freeing her from the prison.
Peter meets up with Johnny Storm later on and learns that Iron Man spread the word about him being Doc Ock for a time and they make up. Their time together even gives Peter an idea on how to use his newly founded company, namely building a new super-prison and depowering Electro as the comic ends.
Okay, review time.
Well, I liked the issue a lot. While I would prefer Peter ask why the hell it took so long for them to figure out Doc Ock was inside his body, he pretty much got word around to most people in the Avengers line. But he’s still dealing with the fallout in the form of Electro and Black Cat, who probably won’t care. Most of all, I like how Anna is dealing with this rationally despite how damn much it must hurt.
5 out of 5 folks. Buy it.
Well, that was interesting last time. Now it’s time to see what’s going to happen to Doug after he was desiccated by the pie-loving young woman. This is my review of X-Factor #8.
The story picks up where it left off with Cypher a dried out husk of himself and the rest of the team stunned at how pie-girl is so disconnected from what she did it was like she didn’t know it was wrong. Danger breaks the tension by asking what sort of pie, which gets the ball rolling with Warlock ready to murder her as her father gets the door open with men and guns at the ready.
Polaris pretty much drags him inside, locks the rest out, and force him to admit he’s told his daughter a huge-ass lie. Turns out he’s kept her so locked out of the real world that she believes the majority of people in the world have powers and the few who didn’t worked with her father. Wow, I’m more amazed at the fact he managed to pull that sort of lie off for years than anything else.
Anyway , the police show up and they need her to fix Cypher, but like most mutants who didn’t get training she has very little idea on how to reverse her power but can try if she can get some water. Danger and Warlock clear a path while they make for the kitchen so she can try and reverse it while her father tells her he was just trying to protect her… to be fair, as far as bigots go he’s nowhere near the worst in having a mutant kid.
Rahne’s father straight-up beat and tried to kill her. Not saying its right, but it could have been worse.
In the kitchen she explains she normally drains moisture out of things, which she learned by killing her first kitten by accident, and her father started home-schooling her. She’s going to get as much moisture in her as she can and then put that into him the same way she took it out. Her father points out that it could possibly kill her and Gambit jacks him up and demands to know how could he rail against mutants knowing his daughter was one.
He states he didn’t know when she was born and that she was god’s punishment on him. Gambit points out that maybe the big man was trying to tell him something, but he reasons that maybe god was a dick and just wanted him to hate him as well. Mission accomplished there, but he doesn’t hate the girl since she’s his late wife’s legacy. Gambit must also be off his game, because he gets kicked off by Georgina’s dad and only his daughter telling him to let her try this and if it fails and she dies she’ll have a one-on-one talk with god about it gets him to settle down for a moment.
Once the moment passes Quicksilver takes him and sits him down elsewhere only for men with tracer bullets that would follow him to the ends of the earth to threaten opening fire on him. Never mind the fact that he could probably trap them in a steel box or knock their tracer mechanism out with a pipe or just hide behind a steel wall and let them shatter to pieces unless they’re made of adamantium. Fortunately Harrison Snow shows up out of nowhere to prevent even more ammo from being wasted and takes Scott to discuss this in private like they’re old friends. Quicksilver and the head bodyguard are just as confused as we are.
While Georgina succeeds in reviving Cypher, the police decide to try sniping them. Polaris hijacks their guns and gives them thirty seconds before she opens fire. Her father wouldn’t have given them even that, so they wisely decide to leave as Cypher offers to take Georgina to the JGS when Danger ruins the sales-pitch by pointing out they train to fight evil mutants, risk their lives, and die repeatedly.
She runs like any sane person would as Warlock basically confirm it. To be fair, Danger and Warlock aren’t lying. There are only a handful of X-Men who haven’t died and aren’t wallpaper yet. When her dad is in a meeting she uses her powers to bring the door crumbling down and we learn that he and Harrison Snow want her to go with him.
It’s damn heartbreaking as he tells her that he loved his daughter and when she became a mutant she was just some thing that replaced her. He can’t even face her as he says it while Snow is looking nonchalant about it. As the comic ends it’s made clear that Snow forced him to say it and he’s driven to near tears while alone….
Okay, review time.
Yeah… I’m starting to think Harrison might be evil. He’s taking the man’s daughter as a hostage (come on, even though they didn’t say it we all know that’s what it is). That being said, the fact that he knew where his team was and managed to get inside the locked-down building brings up questions.
Either way, he did bail them out of trouble that they had no business getting involved with. Like I said in my last review they broke a ton of laws that you can’t do when part of a corporate super-hero team and Harrison straight-up Mafia’d them out of trouble to probably save his own ass.
Other than that, I find myself somewhat sympathizing with the man. Don’t get me wrong, I hate bigots in Marvel and if he was a Purifier I would be rooting for someone to put him down. But he’s having his daughter taken away from him because of whatever dirt Snow has on him and the alternative would have somehow been worse. He gets some pity from me… only some, not a lot.
The fact that the comic could make me feel anything like that deserves a 4 out of 5 and only misses a perfect score because the artwork hurts my eyes.
Magneto’s hunt for those responsible for the poor-man’s omega sentinels has come to an end, but his task isn’t done in protecting mutant-kind. So today we take a moment to look into why he fights once more in this review of his solo series 4th issue.
The story begins with Magneto walking through a pristine and isolated mountain forest. He states he chose that spot because it reminds him that the world is much bigger than the war he’s fighting and had his youth not been stolen from him he may have enjoyed taking a break in the wilderness. Then he opens a lock hidden in a tree with his powers and reveals that he has a secret base in the mountain. Apparently he hadn’t been there in a few years but came back after his latest mission.
Not the omega sentinels one of course. We cut to a scene where a school bus carrying mutants is heading to a remote farm. The seemingly jerkass humans taking them there make many references to god and how they’re better off ignorant of what awaits them, so it goes without saying they’re Purifiers. Naturally Magneto would have words with them and you discover just how brutally he can murder someone with barbed wire. Broken powers my ass.
Turns out that farm they were taking those kids to was a research facility and many dead bodies are laid about as Magneto strolls through to find dissected mutant kids who were taken apart and had their powers cataloged before they were killed. Yeah, I don’t care how you sugarcoat this or dress it up with religion the Purifiers are fucking monsters worse than most of the villains in Marvel.
Therefore, rather than pointing out their hypocrisy on calling out Magneto killing ‘innocents’ when they do shit like this, I point out the dumbasses thought to do it in metallic armor while confronting someone who could control metal. The fight is more of a slaughter, as it always has been, and while he claims they fight because of misguided faith I claim they did it because they got off on killing mutants and it let them get out their violent urges while waving a banner of religion as their shield.
Back in that mountain base it turns out that Magneto has the names of thousands of mutants killed before their time with each one to serve as a scar and fuel his rage. As he adds dozens more to the list from dealing with that last mission, it’s clear that this is a memorial and the first of many. But the rest of the memorials are carved in the blood of his enemies and on their graves to remind him of how small the world is in the face of his rage because of things like this as the comic ends.
Okay, review time…
I hate the Purifiers. Let that be known. Monsters and villains with ambitions are better than these sanctimonious pricks and makes for a damn good reason why Magneto does what he does.
Art-wise the comic is about the same as always, but what moves this story is the plot and the message sent as Magneto adds those names to the list of countless others. 5 out of 5 is my score for this.
And we’ve reached a turning point in Uncanny X-Men #21 folks! Read this review for my thoughts on the matter!
The story picks up where it left off with Cyclops blasting the JGS staff as his powers run out of control until he passes out. Naturally things go from bad to worse as Magik goes Dark Childe and summons a dragon. Storm puts them both down with a bolt of lightning and the group needs to decide what to do with the two as Beast says he’ll handle it. Part of me was cheering that Beast may have been done in by the blast, but it was false hope. Maybe he’ll try to redeem himself by not being a douche-bag, but he doesn’t even get a chance as Mystique wearing Dazzler’s skin has come for the two of them with SHIELD backing her in Helicarriers.
Wait, back up a page. How the hell does Storm know that Magik has Limbo inside of her? She shouldn’t know that unless her daughter from the future told her, and I’d like to have seen that on-panel or at least an admission. And why the hell is Quentin in his bathrobes outside in the rain? Plot-holes!
Uh…anyway, back in Madripoor we have the Blob earning respect the only way you can in the place: kicking the shit out of everyone else in a bar brawl. Like he said, he was an original brotherhood member and he will be respected. But naturally his drug-gained powers fail and he needs his next fix, so like all junkies who know where the source of their drugs come from he goes to get some fresh from it.
He leads Magneto straight to Dazzler, who rightfully points out Mystique has made him a druggie and he should be ashamed. Magneto does not tolerate mutants being exploited for MGH and given the rampage he’s been on in his own series, the only reason Blob is still alive is because they’ve known each other so long. Magneto frees her and they both set out to go fuck up Mystique’s plans.
Back at the JGS it comes as no surprise Maria Hill is there and wants Cyclops. She’s got the hots for him and this is a chance she doesn’t want to pass on. But, since having something wrong with him could potentially back fire while in bed, she gives Beast an hour to see what the hell he can do to fix it, much to the shock of Mystique-Dazzler. They don’t have five minutes before Helmet Head, who I now suspect is a future student of Beast’s from his dialogue, takes control of their Helicarriers and open fire.
Beast, in another moment of shocking competence, tells Storm to take the battle head-on and keep the school intact while he figures out who is responsible by examining Cyclops and Magik. Man, getting chewed out by the Watcher did some damn good after all. Too bad he got shot. As for Maria Hill, SHIELD once more proves their incompetence as they explain they’ve been compromised (again) and Storm brings down the lightning on them.
We then have a brief cut to the NXS school, where the kids have been looking all over for Emma. Her daughters don’t even need to read her mind to know she’s worried and annoyed for Cyclops since he left without her, like you would expect from an ex-girlfriend who isn’t out to ruin your life because you broke up with her. This is a rarity, of course. She says she can feel something is wrong and just as she does something in the sky comes falling down towards them.
The JGS sends out a message for the students to get to the emergency bunker as Quire reads Maria’s head to try and figure out why they’re attacking and Mystique-Dazzler is just walking away. Meanwhile Beast still proves himself a douche-bag by talking trash to an unconscious man he’s known his entire mutant career, but he does say he knows who is responsible just as the Helmet Head tells him it’s time to show him who’s the smarter one as the comic ends.
Fucking teasers! Would it have killed them to just say the guy’s name in the last panel so people could rail about it! Stop dragging it out, Marvel!
Ahem… okay, review time.
The art was not to my liking but sadly was standard for this series, which is a damn shame considering how All-New X-Men is goddamn beautiful. Even worse is the fact that the pages are a jumbled mess to me as they cut away at the worst times. They couldn’t have done the NXS scene before the scene with Maria appearing?
The plot is moving, so there’s that, but I can’t give this more than a 3 out of 5.
Unlike every superhero ever, I’m in the beginning stages of a cold so I’m going to just schedule this to premiere at midnight and try to fall asleep before the sun goes down. I’m just saying Batman could have had his leg blown off the night before and tonight he’d still be dragging himself to the Batmobile while incoherently growling to Alfred, “The Riddler is still out there!” But our fictional characters exist as the best version of humanity (and aliens), so I figure what better way than to show that with a wildly underrated character (at least to casual fans): Sue Storm Richards, the Invisible Woman.
Sue didn’t gain her force field powers until Fantastic Four #22 and despite being a mother, didn’t change her codename from the Invisible Girl to Invisible Woman until Fantastic Four #284. But unlike Thing’s super strength, Human Torch’s fire, and Mr. Fantastic’s elasticity, her…
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